i used to babysit zach and amanda.
on easter eve i was doing just that.
i was tuned into the history channel, sucked in on some "jesus easter crap" special. back then i wanted to believe, i wanted to be saved. however; i had my doubts.
"jesus easter crap" was freaking me out.
"jesus, are you truly the son of god?"
"jesus, can you make it rain on these hoes?"
"jesus, if you are by any means my holy saviour, let yourself me known to me!!"
that's it! i will only accept jesus into my heart if he shows himself to me. appearing in a head of cabbage would be fine, leaving a little note on my daybed that reads "michelle, it's me.
-jesus" would be fantastic, or just fucking meet me at strabucks, i don't give a shit how you do it just DO IT!!
it was jesus fever.
parents come home, drunk, ready to fuck.
i go home determined on finding jesus.
it was a spooky drive back west on this average easter eve.
THERE HE WAS! SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT! IT'S FUCKING JESUS, I KNEW IT! I'M NOT SURE IF I WANT VALUES AND FAITH ANYMORE!
there jesus was smack-dab in the middle of cumming street, 50 feet in front of my 1992 black blazer in all of his jesus glory!
i slammed on the brakes, my blood left my heart, my sternum went up in flames, and my head was filled with some sort of radio static...i didn't want to be seeing jesus. not now. not ever.
frightened, i deliberately took my right foot off of the brake pad, and placed it purposely on the gas pedal. i pressed down with my big toe. i moved.
jesus didn't move.
i moved more.
jesus just stood there.
i began a steady pace up the street.
jesus was on a skate-board. jesus was on a skate-board?
jesus was a 12-year neighbor boy named eric on a skate-board.
thank god for jesus.